Just Tryin' to be Vegetarian

By Marlena Riddell

It’s been about six weeks since I’ve been on the no-meat express and although it’s been a little taxing, I feel it’s going along quite well. I’m not going to say that I don’t miss meat, I totally do. I just had a dream I was inhaling a massive steak while Bradley Cooper gazed upon me from across a table (This for real happened. Although, I did watch Silver Linings Playbook before going to bed).

Not ingesting meat has been a bit rough, yes, but the health benefits have been uncanny. It’s hard for me to explain but my body just has been working better. I don’t want to gross you out but my BM’s have been impressive. I give myself a gentle pat on the back when I give the ‘ol glance-and-flush. I also feel lighter if that makes any sense. You know, not as logy. Health benefits are a bonus but there has been one obstacle that’s been a bit irritating.

Cravings aside, one of the biggest challenges I’ve encountered so far is the reaction I get from peers and friends when I tell them I’m currently not eating meat. 

For starters, I never want to sound like an entitled asshole when I try to explain my reasoning for not eating meat. 

I don’t think that’s the goal of most vegetarians but unfortunately that’s how it comes across to some. I know all meat isn’t terrible and I’m aware that bacon is heavenly. I get it. I also get that this is my life and I’m just trying a new route for awhile. Stop judging me!

I could understand if I was one of those dicks who has a shame finger out when a friend orders a steak at dinner, but I’m not. Steak is delicious! Go nuts, I don’t really care what your diet consists of, just let me keep doing what I’m doing. Oh, and would you wipe that befuddled look off your face when I describe my diet to you? I’m not from Mars, for cryin’ out loud.

I’d be a fool if I didn’t think this wasn’t going to be tough. One day at a time, I guess.

Do any other vegetarians get similar reactions? Please let me know that I’m not the only one!

Marlena Riddell is a PR and social media specialist for Foodgasm.